Fast Forward

Yes, shall we? Forgive me readers for I have sinned. It has been nearly four months since my last blog session... and there have been many sins, wins, dins and even a few gins...
Okay - here are the last few months in fast forward:

• Eight weekends spent at the cottage in the new cabin (so long one-bathroom shared between four-six people through paper-thin walls! helloooo personal space - a blessing for all parties involved!);
  
• Four days spent impersonating a celebrity soaking up the sunshine in champagne-induced giddyness in Monte Carlo courtesy of lil' sis's amazing employer;
  
• Two days in Paris playing frantic-tour-guide-on-a-masochistic-mission-to-do-most-on-foot "'cause it's the best way to see the sites!" All this while lil' sis feigned excitement at my deep knowledge of Rue De L'Arbre (where I stayed two years ago when I tried to blend in as a local);
  
• One wedding - to end all weddings
  
• One 32nd birthday (egads it was mine!);
  
• Two pregnancy announcements (egads, not mine!)
• XXXX glasses of wine, champagne, wine, champagne, wine...(to shcelebraaate the shchummer! whahoo!)
• One 30th Birthday - lil' sis
• and finally the last engagement is mine... no literally, it was my engagement!
  

That brings us to around nowish... After four years of wondering if he was the one, deciding he was the one, doubting he was the one and thanking my lucky stars he IS the one, it's official. I'm a crazy bride-to-be who hasn't changed any of the bad habits she swore she would "as soon as he pops the question." I'm talking about eating bad food, complaining about our house, not going to the gym, drinks during the week, driving to work... still doing all of it.
Which, as you may have guessed you smart little thing, is the reason I am writing again. The moment this gets posted, it's on the record and I'm accountable for all the things I say I'm going to do.
So here it is, My Oath to Myself:
I solemnly swear that from this moment on, pizza is no longer legal substance. Cheeseburgers, hamburgers, homeburgers and their French sidekicks, are on the No-Fly list unless accompanied by a Weight Watchers green light. Prohibition Sunday through Thursday just kicked in. (That goes for you too Prosecco. Save me the story about your bubbly lightness!) I will refuse to attend any and all birthday parties where Cake is invited, that bitch. I will go to the gym, walk home from work (at least twice a week), embrace the veggie bar and every time I reach to grab a roll during dinner, I give permission to anyone in my company to reach and grab one of mine.
This is my vow, Until the wedding!

summer, how i've missed you

Okay so I have basically all but skipped over winter/spring 2010 and mostly because nothing good comes of winter/spring unless you're everyone else but me. Congratulations to all the lucky ducks who: got engaged, got married, had a baby, had two babies, had someone tell you you were having a baby or two babies, had a baby birthday, bought a house, bought a car, got a new job, went back to a job, quit a job, took vacation, planned a vacation etc. etc. etc... All fantastically lovely things to happen to people... just not to me.

Alas, after an eternity of winter/spring 2010, summer is finally HERE! Now, some of you may argue that summer in Canada is still months away but I beg to differ. And here's Carly's top ten reasons why:

1. I left the office last week after 7PM and it was still sunny - when it wasn't raining


2. I wore a dress without stockings last week (albeit my legs looked straight out of Twilight and I wore closed-toed shoes but haven't had a tan or a pedicure since before Jack F-ing Frost messed with my happiness back in October 2009)


3. I am going for a pedicure tonight and plan to wear open-toed shoes tomorrow...yep, to work and no, will not be wearing stockings
   
4. I've already had dinner and drinks on the back patio at Caren's Wine Bar - a summer staple for delicious vino and a must-do if in Toronto even for just one drink!
   
5. I spent a weekend at the cottage and didn't have to hover around the hot stove wrapped in various animal pelts
   
6. Anxiety levels are at an all-time high with the realization I'll be forced to break up with those ten cushy pounds I've snuggled up to all of these long, cold winter months... we've gotten so close, it's hard to say goodbye - no really, it's hard...


7. I'm not wearing all black, all grey, light grey, dark grey, grey with black, black with navy, navy with grey... in fact, I am wearing a top that has a colour in it that I'm pretty sure qualifies as neon pink, no joke


8. I'm giving up on my au natural brunette phase in favour of some warm highlights - conveniently those lighter strands will serve double duty to cover the obnoxious silver sprouts


9. I have a little pot of herbs sitting on my balcony that haven't shrivelled up from frost bite (or lack of watering... mental note to do that tonight!)


10. All I want to do is shop for cute, bright, short, floral, checked, striped, solid, colourful, shoes, tops, bottoms, dresses, hats, shoes, sunglasses, lipsticks, bracelets, earrings, shoes and... shoes
    

Think it's going to be a hot summer and I mean that in the most literal and figurative of ways. How do you know when summer has arrived?

ohai! remember me

Yes, I've been MIA and yes it was negligent and no I don't have a super-fantastical story/excuse like being glamourously whisked off to add my creative input on Marc Jacobs' Fall/Winter 2010 line in Milan AND Paris or being pulled from my PR gig in Toronto to provide crisis communications to Sandi Bullock in her L.A. hideaway. Alas, I've simply been uninspired and in a word, grouchy.

Naturally, it could just be me, but lets be honest, it's far more fun to blame others for this, my most recent plunge into rutsville. Today, I'm blaming my hairdresser. Remember a few weeks back when I decided to become a new woman and undergo a dramatic transformation? And that resulted in going from a blondie to a brownie? Well I'm still a brownie...mostly... save for those arrogant, uninvited, multiplying-like-bunnies silver threads I keep spotting at my crown as they rise in all their wiry glory toward the light of day. And every morning, there are more of those little a$$holes lying against what I once considered a beautifully rich chocolate. They are so out of place that they may as well be neon flashing lights. I knew they were there before but my light, golden locks artfully disguised the pests, blending in with the pale strands so nicely, I actually convinced myself I was sprouting naturally blond hair. Now I there is no denying it in blissful ignorance. I am going grey and my hairdresser is to blame because she should have noticed and warned me that this would happen! My guess is that she did and she also knew that I would be miserable and have to make another appointment to go back to the glory days of honey and sunshine and that would mean we're back to four-hour and $$$$ investments every six weeks... well played miss, well played...

in short

My life is not my own these days, hence the absence of regular updates within an acceptable amount of time. Where have two weeks gone? To the universe, I say, along with my last paycheque, that missing sock and a few of my dresses... actually, those went to my sister's closet and are overdue back to their home (hear that, sis? Gimme)

In spite of my lack of time this/last week, I did come across my next birthday present, s'il vous plait. The new Paloma's Dove pendant from the Paloma Picasso collection at Tiffany's has me blushing. There is just something about birds and jewelry that makes me giddy and this sweet, petite charm hits the note. I can't find an image to upload but visit the link and swoon for yourself!

I've also got my eye on a gorgeous enameled bird ring from BCBG but I can't find evidence of it anywhere online and I've tossed my catalogue, for shame. Any gals with the latest BCBG accessories catalogue, please write me... or just buy it for me! :)

home, home on the brain...

I want to buy a house. I think I'm nearing the time in my life to actually own something other than shoes and 15 extra pounds. Self-admittedly, I tend to look at home ownership through a narrow lens, one that all but blocks the vantage point of having to pay for everything that breaks, having to mow the lawn and landscape the garden and having to clean more than three rooms...(anyone know a good cleaning lady looking for work in six-eight months?)

What excites me most about home ownership is Candice Olson. Not to be confused with Anna Olson, the Ontario Sugar-chef whom I also adore, Candice Olson is my favourite of the Canadian-produced W Network Experts. She hosts a show that I feel has been on for decades (which for Canadian television is a feat in and of itself!) The show is called Divine Design and let me just say on the record that this gal takes me to God when she finishes a room. In my next life, I want creative eyes that can look at an average space and create a miracle. Until then, I'll push for a big raise to maybe afford to pay Candice to decorate my new house. OR, if I'm super-duper lucky, I'll find a house that's already got her stamp! Hopefully one of these below...

my mom says I'm a winner

My boyfriend could have dated an Olympian. Not just any Olympian. A Canadian Gold Medal Olympian. As we watched the medal ceremony at the Vancouver 2010 Olympic Games, one eye was on the pretty young thing accepting her medal with the stoicism best served only by a Canadian, while my other eye watched as my guy grinned, recounting a once-upon-a-time when he had met Ms. Gold Medal and she had taken quite a fancy to him.

While I am often self-depracating and poke fun at myself in many a situation, hopelessly self-conscious I am not... well not really, anyway. But I can say I may have preferred to file this one away under "things your partner never need know." Now, I'm not going to get all bent out of shape on this. She may have "won" gold for her country but I prefer not to "compete" for glory. Besides, where can you actually wear that medal? That kind of accessory is some mayjah overkill on an LBD, non?

I will now accept my medal for bitterness and snarkery. Insert bitchy smile and pageant wave here and pass me a double scoop of Gold Medal Ribbon stat!

more things sweet

Cake decorating has become a hot and scrumptious hobby amongst many in my extended Facebook friend group and I am obsessed. I think I have always been crazy about cake. There is nothing better in the world to me than digging into a fresh square of grocery-store-bought vanilla birthday cake, covered in sugary-smooth icing - corner piece to ensure maximum icing!

My obsession with cakes often finds me alone at home, salivating while watching TLC sweet shows like Cake Boss and the Ultimate Cake Off and reading tasty blogs like the incredible Amy Atlas and Bakerella.

While I dream of one day rolling out large sheets of fondant and painting edible damasks on 8-inch rounds, I am fascinated by this incredible find today at http://ticings.com/

Edible icing paper! Incredible and probably nowhere near a new idea but certainly new to me. Okay so for sure they're not new - think back to the novelty days of photo cakes (neat-o!), but these designs are rather lovely. The sheets are made of water, cornstarch and corn syrup and are available in a variety of patterns and sizes. They have no noticeable taste (says the website) and take on the flavour of your cake, brownie or cookie. Ticings "easily peel and press onto your frosted dessert. even a child can apply them to frosted cupcakes" (lucky for me and my child-like wonder) and sadly, they are only available for purchase in the U.S. Opportunity for a Canadian contemporary counterpart? I say yes!

I particularly crush on the Team Jacob/Team Edward/Bite Me sheets... mmm Twilight, is there no one you can't touch?